Review: Susie (The Life and Legacy of Susannah Spurgeon)

Moody Publishers provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for a review; however, the views stated here are my own. 

So much has been written about Charles Spurgeon that it's surprising that more attention has not been given to his wife, Susannah. Though often parted due to ministry or health issues, the love between Charles and Susie preserved a bond of oneness that, undergirded by their love of Christ, anchored them during difficult times. This anchoring allowed Charles Spurgeon, prince of preachers, to have a ministry of great breadth and depth, and it's impossible to separate the man and his ministry from his bride and helpmeet. This is made clear in Susie: the Life of Legacy of Susannah Spurgeon by Ray Rhodes.

As a pastor's wife, I was interested to read about the life of the woman married to one of the most celebrated pastors of the last 200 years. I expected to be informed and even encouraged, but I also came away challenged and convicted.

Susie had a passionate love for Charles (and he for her), and this is made clear through their letters to one another. In one, Susie responds to a letter from her husband, who was low at the time, "Words are but cold dishes on which to serve up thoughts and feelings which come warm and glowing from the heart." She follows this with encouragement to persevere in his ministry, even in the midst of public criticism. Susie recognized that she could provide a counter by "...quenching their fiery darts most easily with the shield of domestic love." Through this love, she graciously reminded him of a greater truth: "Do remember, dear friend, that the God you love, the Master you serve, is never indifferent to your grief, or unwilling to hear your cry."

These were not empty platitudes for Susie. She faced her own trials in the form of ongoing, disabling illness with this same truth, declaring, "Yet how good God has been to me! He has upheld me thorugh days of darkness, and seasons of sorrow, of which none knew but Himself and my own soul."

Susie also had a passion for equipping pastors for their work, and Charles encouraged her in this. The book details the remarkable start and growth of her Book Fund, which distributed 200,000 books to needy pastors over twenty-eight years. She oversaw every detail of this work, selecting each book with care, evaluating each request with a discerning eye, and personally corresponding with each recipient--all while dealing with her own physical limitations. After the death of her beloved husband, the Lord used this very ministry to console her in her deep sorrow.

As the wife of a celebrity pastor of that day, Susie found herself with a platform of her own. In our time, she may have been a blogger and more prolific author; in her own time, she transparently expressed her dependence on God during her own trials through letters, articles, and a handful of books. She never denied the grief, pain, or weariness that she experienced, but used it to point toward the sufficiency of Christ to sustain her. In her writing, she was most concerned with the image of Christ that she portrayed, and she shared undiluted truth in a most winsome way. Without the concern of hitting a bestseller list or building a large blog following, she simply spoke the truth in love.

Susie is a most comprehensive biography, and I learned much about Charles as well as his bride. It encouraged me anew in ways to come alongside my pastor husband to love and encourage him, as well as to pursue serving others with my own gifts. As the author (a friend of mine) is a great promoter of both marital and ministry joy, I can guess this was one of his hopes for his readers!

Review: Devoted (Great Men and Their Godly Moms)

Cruciform Press provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for a review; however, the views stated here are my own. 

One of the hardest roles I've ever held is that of mother. It's truly a case of on-the-job training. And because it's so hands-on, I have tended to focus on the practical day-to-day aspects of mothering. Now that my kids are young adults (though not all launched), it's a whole new ballgame.

With that in mind, I was so encouraged to read Devoted: Great Men and Their Godly Moms by Tim Challies. This little book is a compilation of blogposts about the mothers of eleven men (some you'll know, some you may not). I appreciated that the author invited Melissa Edgington to write "A Mother's Reflection" in response to each biography. She also teamed up with Rebecca Stark to write "questions for reflection" at the end of each chapter.

Challies introduces the book this way:

History tells of women whose love for the Bible shaped its earliest and most prominent teachers, and women whose unceasing prayers led to the long-awaited salvation of their wayward sons. It tells of women who were great theologians in their own right, yet whose only students were their own children. It tells of women who laid an early foundation in the lives of their sons that, despite their best efforts, they could never undermine. It tells, time and time again, of exceptional Christian men who owe so much to their godly mothers.

I gleaned so many lessons from the lives of these women.

• Don't assume children are too young to learn important spiritual truths, or that they are too young for church to matter. Give them the opportunity to build a biblical foundation from an early age -- and be sure you're building that foundation in your own life (from John Newton's mother).
• When your children, especially adult children, are unbelievers, "often the best ministry. . . is the minstry they will never see -- private, faith-filled, daily prayers in the closet." This ministry is fueled by "daily renewal in God's Word" (from Christopher Yuan's mother)
• A deep relationship with Christ, strengthened through "years of prayer, study, ministry, and the development of a biblical worldview" will enable me to respond to heartache with faith, perseverence, and trust (from William Borden's mother).
• "[God] uses ordinary mothers to carry out his purposes" (from John Piper's mother). 
• While children are young, plead with God for their salvation . . . right in front of them (Charles Spurgeon's mother).
• Respond to rebellion with earnest prayer (from Augustine's mother).

Some of these mothers were consistent in their faith, others were weaker, yet God saw fit to use each in her own way to spiritual impact her son. This, too, was encouraging to me.

I highly recommend this book. It not only makes for great devotional reading, it would also be a good small group (such as a book club) choice, with great application and discussion question already prepared.

Adversity

Some of the women from church have been discussing Jerry Bridges' classic work, Trusting God. I was first introduced to this book years ago, and it was (and continues to be) very helpful in helping me understand God's sovereignty.

This is one of many, many quotes I've marked in my book. It was worth sharing, and I had a few extra minutes this morning (as I'm home with my sick hubby). Read the book, often.

Analog vs Digital (or How I Use a Bullet Journal)

This post contains affiliate links.


The author of one of my favorite e-newsletters recently confessed that she's struggling in her attempted transition to using a bullet journal. I've experienced a similar struggle over the past couple of years; in fact, last year I attempted to go full-on digital*. And failed.

My search for the perfect calendar/project system began in high school (nerd alert!) when I became yearbook co-editor. A few years later, my employer brought in a time management expert to teach us how to use the system he'd developed, and I was hooked. Over the years, I experimented with other systems, finally coming up with a funky hybrid that worked well for me... at least at the office. Once I came home to work, all bets were off.

When I started homeschooling, I knew that my fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants approach just wasn't going to cut it. A wise woman recommended this book (sadly, no longer in print) and, while her unit approach to homeschooling wasn't for me, her home/task organization tips and charts saved my sanity, especially when my kids were younger.

Years went by, I drifted through various planners and systems... then I discovered the bullet journal idea. It's a big idea, because it's completely customizable. It doesn't require a huge financial investment, and it can flex as I go. And while I'm pretty good at making lists and adding things to my calendar, I did find one weakness in my use of a Bullet Journal: me, or rather me sometimes forgetting to check it and letting things fall through the cracks. And that's what led me to try to go full analog with Todoist and Cozi last year. But there was just one problem. I'm more of an analog person. I enjoy writing things down, turning pages, seeing what a previous day or month looked like.

Besides those things, the biggest reason I stuck with the bullet journal is just the ability to keep all those stinking lists I write in one place. Good things that happen can be telegraphed onto a monthly or daily page, but I can also add a little more info on a journal or gratitude page, if I want. That list of books I want to read or need to review is easy to include, and I love seeing things get checked off. Random quotes, snippets of poetry, blog post ideas, prayer requests, inspiration, hostess notes -- there's a logical way to fit it all in. I can make it mine.

This year, my plan has morphed into an analog/digital hybrid (and we'll see how that goes). I use my bullet journal for the basics, such as the monthly calendar page and daily to do lists. But I also use the reminder app on my phone for time sensitive things (like "finish taxes once and for all" or "give dog monthly meds" or if I'm out and about and need a quick brain dump (because I usually think of things I need to do at exactly the moment I cannot do them). I use Trello for projects that relate to internet resources. And I'm wholly devoted to the Cozi app for our family calendar and quick shopping lists.

Here's another confession: at some point, I got a bit sidetracked by all the overwhelmingly pretty and creative bullet journals out there on Instagram and Pinterest. Look, that's fine for some, but most of the time, it's all I can do to keep things legible, much less beautiful. So I've decided to save my creativity for things I want to see and share -- encouraging words on index cards for my family, favorite quotes on my chalkboard wall, handwritten notes to friends. 
So here's my encouragement to the struggling e-newsletter author: 

...give a try for a couple of months, but make it yours. That's the beauty of the whole thing. Let it be a tool to help you live the life you want to live, to free you to use your gifts, to serve God and others, and to just be able to think. And as I re-read those last sentences, I think to myself, "There's a life lesson in there, even beyond my bullet journal."

*This book prompted my analog attempt; while the digital approach didn't work for me, the principles set forth in this book are still foundational in my current analog/hybrid approach.

Don't Waste Your Snow Sunday



I originally posted this January 23, 2016, but have made a few updates for this posting in 2017.



Our church has cancelled tomorrow's church activities, thanks to Winter Storm Jonas (in 2017, it's Winter Storm Helena). I'm reminded of a time when our oldest was about eight years old. We were staying home from church (due to some complications in my pregnancy), and Jeff told Christopher on Saturday night that we were going to have church at home the next day. When Jeff and I came out to the living room that Sunday morning, we discovered that our son had built a small pulpit out of boxes and books, had selected some songs for us to sing, and had even hand-written bulletins for us! He had a very definite idea of what church should look like!



As I'm sure many of you will be kept home, too, it seemed like a good time to share some ideas for worshiping at home when you are prevented from meeting together (Hebrews 10:23-25). You won't need hand-written bulletins and a make-shift pulpit for any of these, but I have included some links that might be helpful.

1. Listen to (or watch) one of your own church's previous sermons. There may be one you missed while serving in the nursery, traveling over the summer or holidays, or home with a sick child. Or there may be a favorite you'd like to chew on a bit more. For those at my church, a few recommendations might be The Real Grinch of Christmas (only 28 minutes!), Walking Worthy, or Putting on an Honest Intimacy. Tip: Find at least one take-away for your family to encourage one another in throughout the week.
2. Watch another church's live-streamed service. This allows you to see the full service, not simply the sermon. You can still participate to a limited degree, and it's a great opportunity to work with young children on church etiquette. Faith Bible Church and Grace Community Church both offer live-streaming of their services, and you can be certain of God-honoring worship and a sound biblical sermon. Tip: Some live-streaming requires you to set up an account prior to watching. Be sure to check on this prior to the service time to avoid being delayed.
3. Watch (or listen to) a previously recorded sermon from a church other than your own. Both Faith Bible and Grace Community have sermon video available; you can also find audio via their websites or podcasts. Other messages I'd recommend include If God is for Us, Who Can be Against Us? by Don Whitney, and The Church: The Beginning and End of Missions by Thabiti Anyabwile. Tip: Take a few notes to help prompt some discussion afterward.
4. Read aloud to your family, and talk about what you read. Whether you read a portion of Scripture (maybe from the book your pastor is preaching through), or a book that has encouraged you in your own walk of faith, or a missionary biography (some of these are free to download) share it with your family. Tip: Read enthusiastically -- you and your family will enjoy it more.
5. Sing together. Find some favorite songs and worship together! If you grew up singing hymns, but your kids aren't as familiar with hymns, this is a great time to introduce them to some solid, time-tested favorites . Or, if you're not as familiar with some of the newer music your church sings, now's your chance to practice together. Maybe there's a song that particularly reminds you of the gospel (In Christ Alone, anyone?); this is a wonderful time to sing it together and discuss its truths with your family. Tip: You don't have to be musically or vocally gifted to do this. Singing together karaoke-style is fine!
6. Pray together. Really pray together. Tip: Tim Challies shares some wisdom from John Piper about how to pray, and I believe this would be helpful for families praying together.
7. Enjoy this unique time with your family. Whatever you decide to do, relax and have joy in it. Tip: Remember that the word worship literally means worthness (not workness!). 

 I'd love to hear how your family has worshiped together during times when you've been hindered from going to church. Please share in the comments!






Photo: AnnaKate took this photo of Bella two years ago during an unusual snow event in Middle Georgia. This is pretty much representative of Bella's attitude about the snow, which contrasts sharply with my own.

Review: Martin Luther

Cross Focused Reviews provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for a review; however, the views stated here are my own. This review has also been posted on Amazon.com and Goodreads. This post contains affiliate links. 


Martin Luther, Simonetta Carr's latest addition to the Christian Biographies for Young Readers, tells the story of Luther's life and the beginning of the Reformation in a brief and attractive format. Don't be deceived by the series title, though. While the book is written to engage young readers, I found myself drawn into Luther's story -- even through much of it was familiar to me! I also appreciated learning more about his post-95-theses work, when he focused on providing biblical education.

While Carr's writing style drops you right into Luther's life, Troy Howell's beautiful illustrations help set the mood and tone of the time period. Original paintings and engravings of the people and region complement the storytelling, as well.

While not all of Luther's writings are exemplary (and Carr makes this clear when appropriate), his courage and conviction in learning and upholding the truth during a time of persecution can be a great encouragement to us, even in our own increasingly-difficult times.

As we look toward celebrating the 500th anniversary of the Reformation in 2017, this book provides a great launching point. I recommend this book as a great addition to the reading libraries of families, churches, and schools alike.



{You may also be interested in my review of John Knox from the same series. Many of the general comments made there apply to this book, as well!}

Review: Christ All Sufficient

"Through the power of the gospel and the work of the Spirit, we are being restored to our humanity. The gospel makes us fully alive, fully ourselves. By God's grace, we are becoming human again."

Brian Hedges

Over the past year, my pastor has been teaching through Colossians. It's been a much-discussed epistle in our home for years (in case you don't know, I happen to be married to my pastor), but hearing these verse-by-verse messages has been so helpful. When I learned that Brian Hedges had recently published a new commentary on Colossians, Christ All Sufficient: An Exposition of Colossians, I looked forward to reading it. You see, I read (and reviewed) Hedges' book, Active Spirituality, a couple of years ago and found it very helpful.

I'm no Bible scholar. I have no seminary training and do not know the biblical languages. As a Christian, however, I am a student of the Bible. For all of these reasons, I appreciate that this commentary is easily accessible to believers at all stages. Hedges admittedly draws from sermons he prepared for his own congregation, as well as the scholarship of others who have influenced him along the way. These roots make the book readable, while providing stepping stones to further reading, if desired.

For me, the book was strengthened by the clear illustrations of theological truths that were included. Some of these are timeless, others are currently more culturally relevant, all were helpful. I also appreciated the inclusion of oft-forgotten hymns that teach the truths of Scripture.

Christ All Sufficient provides clarity on the meaning of Colossians, but goes even further by providing challenging application, as well. This makes the book more than a resource for teachers of the Word, but not less than that. Throughout the book, Hedges reminds the reader of Paul's main purpose in writing this letter:

With every stroke of the pen, Colossians proclaims, "Christ is supreme! Christ is sufficient! If you have him, you have all you need!"

I requested and received a copy of this book in exchange for an impartial review. 

Review: The Dynamic Heart in Daily Life

"People actively make choices all day long. These countless decisions flow from the more hidden dedications of the heart. Whether strongly conscious or less conscious, the heart's intentions drive a person's actions. People are, in large part, who they choose to be."

Jeremy Pierre

The Dynamic Heart in Daily Life: Connecting Christ to Human Experience is a convicting personal read, as well as helpful in counseling others -- as all good counseling books should be.

In The Dynamic Heart in Daily Life, Jeremy Pierre seeks to help the reader see the that our hearts respond to life in a three-fold manner: cognitively (knowledge/beliefs), affectively (desires/emotions), and volitionally (choices/commitments). Rather than being a clinical analysis, this perspective helps us understand that we are "wholly spiritual persons". And Pierre is careful to say that while "...all problems are spiritual problems, I am not saying they are merely spiritual. People have bodies as well--bodies that function not as vehicles to an independent soul that drives it, but more like the canvas and paint embodying the ideas of an artist.... all human responses are by nature spiritual."

The premise of the book is well expressed in the introduction:

People are often only partially aware of the beliefs and values residing within them, and they will tend to read these beliefs and values into Scripture. People must become more willing to listen to God's voice for what it actually is rather than what they want it to be. As Scripture is thus received in the heart, God's revelation shapes people's thoughts, feelings, and choices.

The book is divided into three sections. The first section deals with how the heart responds dynamically. This includes a careful look at what the heart was designed for, how it was corrupted and redeemed, and how it is affected by its context. The second section deals with what the heart dynamically responds to. This section examines four facets of influence upon the heart. The last section deals brings us to nuts and bolts of counseling from this biblical paradigm.

I found The Dynamic Heart in Daily Life to present a strong, biblical perspective on common struggles, along with very practical helps in working through these struggles. It's not a quick read, but worthy of chewing on as you go. This book will be helpful for pastors, counselors, and believers who simply want to work out their own salvation (Phil 2:12) and walk side-by-side with others in this same pursuit.

"God designed the heart's functions for worship: he wants people to respond to him with the complex beauty that reflects his own. Dynamic hearts worship God in daily life--in the way they think, the things they want, the choices they make."

Jeremy Pierre

I requested and received a copy of this book in exchange for an impartial review. 

This and that 8/10/16

I'm still planning to catch up on those book club posts (in case anyone was wondering), but until those are ready, I thought I'd do a quick round-up post for you.

Despite my well-known aversion to exercise of any sort, I've (re)started Pilates. I'd done a little Pilates at home before, but the online instructor was young, bubbly, and just exhausting. I found a bunch of free workouts from The Balanced Life, and they're much more my speed. I started with her beginners' series (actually did this a couple of times) before moving on to another challenge on her channel. As you can see from the Instagram photo above, Pilates is a team sport in my house.

In just a few weeks, I'll be starting what will probably be my last year of homeschooling. My youngest child will be in his final year of high school. It's hard to believe! With almost twenty years of homeschooling under my belt, I feel like I should know so much more. But you know, the further I get down this road, the less I feel like an expert -- but the more comfortable I feel about the whole thing. I think it's because I've settled into my role of not teaching my kids stuff, but teaching them to be learners. Lee Binz briefly explains here, and David Murray discusses its importance here (this post will be required reading for my son this year, as it was last year).

I've been thinking about how to listen to my pastor/hubby's sermons lately as I've discussed expository sermons with others. This post on 3 Keys to Listening to Sermons is a great starting point for older children through adults. And I'm really excited about My Church Notebook, a new kids' resource from Children Desiring God.

And this is the summer I've learned to embrace iced coffee, thanks to Starbucks Cold Brew with Sweet Vanilla Cream. Thankfully, I've learned to make my own cold brew minus the Sweet Vanilla Cream (which would probably cancel out the Pilates anyway). I'm a convert.

What have you been up to this summer?

Book Club: The Marks of Biblical Friendship

Chapter 3 of The Company We Keep took us a bit deeper into the nuts and bolts of biblical friendship. The chapter outlines "four characteristics that distinguish wise friendships": constancy, candor, carefulness, and counsel.

 ...friendship isn't so much a series of things we need to do. Friendship is more about who we need to be.

...friendship flourishes best when we seek to be and embody the type of friend we see in God himself.

Constancy can be described as being dependable "through good times and bad times, in times of prosperity and adversity." We are sharing in one another's joys and sorrows, blessings and challenges (Ephesians 4:1-3). And part of being a constant friend is being available, both physically and emotionally. As we identify and act on biblical priorities in life (more on this in Chapter 4), we'll be intentional about making time for deep friendship -- and we'll build in margin for unexpected opportunities, as well. And as we grow in our own faith, we'll be able to serve others well in friendship rather than serve our emotion-of-the-moment.

Candor is courageously speaking "truth in love for the good of your friend" (Ephesians 4:15). While this may sometimes involve admonishment, more often it can simply be reminding our friend of biblical -- God's faithfulness, mercy, grace, love. Just as we must preach the gospel to ourselves every day, we can candidly encourage one another (yes, even our fellow believers!) by preaching the gospel to them every day. (And if you're looking for a great book that includes this idea of preaching the gospel to yourself, read Discipline of Grace by Jerry Bridges. In fact, it's a great book to read and discuss with a friend!)

Carefulness in biblical friendship "urges wisdom and consideration in how to live out the life of friendship," including including care in speech and timing, as well "wise stewardship of a friend's trust." This requires getting to know our friend well in order to serve them best. As we seek to act in carefulness, we consider the need of the moment (Ephesians 4:29).

Counsel is offered as we seek to build another up through "living out the one-another's of Scripture together" as we journey together toward Christlikeness. It's not a professional relationship, but simply purposeful friendship along life's way.

One of the things we seem to be searching for in life and relationships is to know who we are. And often, we'd like someone else to help us figure that out, to help us find our identity. But what we really need is to know Whose we are -- and we need friends who will help remind us Whose we are. The local church is a good place and natural place to seek out and build these friendships.

 This post is the fourth in a series about a summer book club. If you'd like to read more, click the links below.

Post one: Summer Book Club Reading
Post two: What is Biblical Friendship?
Post three: Everyday Substitutes


This post contains affiliate links.

Book Club: Everyday Substitutes

In our summer book club's discussion of Chapter 2 of The Company We Keep, we recognized that, in a fallen world, we often seek out and settle for relational substitutes rather than biblical friendships. As we discussed in Chapter 1, sin turns us inward.

Because of God's common grace, relationships built on these substitutes might even thrive for a time, but they all fall woefully short of God's purposes for true friendship.

Homes identifies three types of relational substitutes: social media friendship, specialized friendship (based on stage of life or common interests), and selfish friendship. Within each of these relationship types, we sacrifice something. And because of what is lacking in these friendships, we never get to the best of biblical friendship. In fact, we often get the worst:

Often, the wounds in our lives are a direct result of insisting that somebody else be our savior and king. (Jonathan Dodson)

We often even turn them into idols, expecting the friendship to do more than friendship was ever designed to do.  Technology, social media, and common interests are helpful contexts and tools to help facilitate friendship, but friendship itself is always more than these.

Truly biblical friendship is embodied in the Trinity, empowered by Jesus Christ, and intended as a spiritual discipline among God's people for the purpose of glorifying him. This is the heart of the matter...

Friendship as a spiritual discipline?  This was, perhaps, the most thought provoking idea we discussed in Chapter 2. Discipline requires intentionality. It requires work. It means we keep the end goal in mind in order to stay the course.

And the end-goal is not me as an individual, or even us as friends. It's the glory of God.

P.S. After reading this chapter, I'm definitely interested in pursuing some of this topic further. The Next Story: Faith, Friends, Family and the Digital World is now on my books-to-get list.



 This post is the third in a series about a summer book club. If you'd like to read more, click the links below.

Post one: Summer Book Club Reading
Post two: What is Biblical Friendship?
Post four: The Marks of Biblical Friendship




This post contains affiliate links. Photo: bossfight.co

Book Club: What is Biblical Friendship?

Detail from The Creation of Adam by Michelangelo Buonarroti (public domain)

As I shared in my last post, some ladies in my church are meeting together for a book club this summer. Our first meeting was this week, and we discussed the first chapter of The Company We Keep by Jonathan Holmes.

To give us a foundation for biblical friendship, Holmes takes us to Genesis. He points out that the Trinity itself is relationship; the very first, in fact. The Father, Son and Holy Spirit exist in perfect communion with one another. He then reminds us that Adam, created in the image of God, was designed with a need for relationship, human relationship: "... part of our image-bearing capacity entails living in relationships with others -- not relationships built merely around common interests, but relationships that emanate from our very nature as image bearers."

Of course, we don't get far in Genesis before sin is born, rupturing all relationships. Holmes reminds us that without the restoration of our relationship with God, our other relationships are likewise tainted with sin. Our motivation for pursuing relationships with others is naturally marked by a desire for personal benefit. And what does the world see in this?

When a non-Christian peers into our friendships, is he or she able to see the outlines of the gospel story, the good news of Jesus Christ? When our friendships exist for our own pleasure, comfort, and relational happiness, rather than a communication of God's love and mercy in the gospel, we're telling the story badly, and we may be telling the wrong story altogether.

Thankfully, through Christ's work on the cross, our relationship with God can be restored. "As God poured out his wrath on Jesus, he restored the friendship that had been broken by our sin."

This remarkable fact reorients our earthly friendships so that, "No longer will our friendships be situated merely around common circumstances or interests, but will instead become an embodied commitment to live out the image of God together in every area of our life." "...Biblical friendship is explicitly Christ-centered."

As this is a book about biblical friendship, Holmes' focus is on our relationships with other believers; this is not a book about evangelism or being missional (other than the impact our biblical friendships can have on a watching world). These friendships are deeper and stronger than the sweet and simple common fellowship we share with other believers. Even as believers, we have much to overcome (mostly within ourselves!) as we seek to form biblical friendships. God's grace makes this possible.

One last note... after our first meeting, I'm even more thankful for this book club. Not only am I benefiting from hearing other women share what they are learning about God, themselves, and biblical friendship, but the group is actually allowing us to get our feet wet, so to speak, as we practice a little bit of what we're learning each week.

This post is the second in a series about a summer book club. If you'd like to read more, click the links below.


Post one: Summer Book Club Reading
Post three: Everyday Substitutes  
Post four: The Marks of Everyday Friendship




This post contains affiliate links.

Summer book club reading

I've never been a part of a book club before, but I've just jumped in with both feet!

A group of women from our church will be meeting weekly to discuss The Company We Keep: In Search of Biblical Friendship by Jonathan Holmes. The ladies have been asked to consider the following questions after reading each chapter:

• What most surprised me in this chapter?
• What scriptural truth did I learn?
• What was my favorite quote from the author?
• How am I motivated to change?

These questions, along with the "Digging Deeper" questions found at the end of each chapter, will help to focus our discussions. The plan is to discuss one chapter each week (there are six), then have some sort of wrap up meeting the seventh week.

It's my goal to post a bit about each chapter and our discussion after each of our weekly meetings, so check back to learn more about what we're doing. And feel free to grab a copy (paperback, Kindle and other ebook formats are all available) and join me here in talking about the book.

This post is the first in a series about a summer book club. If you'd like to read more, click the links below.
 

Post two: What is Biblical Friendship?
Post three: Everyday Substitutes  
Post four: The Marks of Everyday Friendship





This post contains affiliate links. 

The Day God Shut My Mouth

The kids must have been about five and seven years old. Their friend, Kayla, was hanging out with us that day. Everything was going smoothly that morning as the kids busied themselves with schoolwork and I tidied the house for our church's Bible study that evening. And then lunch happened.

I'd warmed up ravioli  for the kids and served the girls first. Then, as I brought Jared's bowl to him, he unexpectedly raised up in his chair. His little blonde head collided hard with my hand and the bowl went flying, showering ravioli and sauce everywhere.

It was one of those moments in life where everything seems to move in slow motion. I'm sure I saw the sauce adhering to the table, to the floor, to the wall (and to the quilt hanging there) -- and maybe even to the kids. But what struck me most was that my children's eyes didn't follow the ravioli or the bowl. They both looked wide-eyed at me. They were waiting for the hammer to fall, for me to express my exasperation with Jared for rising when he did, for the great inconvenience this would cause in my day -- didn't they know I would have to spend my precious time cleaning this up so that things would look nice before our church family came over to do spiritual things with us?

Those eyes. In that moment, I was convicted of my selfishness, my impatience, my exasperation. I realized that this was just an accident; no one set out to create more work for poor mom. And in that moment, I realized that my children were waiting for an explosion of sorts. Not a yelling mess (I don't think), but more of an angry guilt trip. They could already see it building on my face.

I repented in my heart, right then and there. I don't remember exactly how it all went down, but I think I was calm. I think I took a deep breath and said, "It's okay." I think I simply cleaned up the table area and served Jared a fresh bowl, then set out to clean up the rest of the mess.

Do you know what was most convicting to me that day? I was most convicted by the fact that I was initially more willing to withhold my anger because I didn't want my best friend's daughter to see me that way. Pride: I had an image to guard. But then, in the slow motion of the moment, I realized that if I could find enough self control to do that, I could find the self control to guard my children's hearts, as well. And while I was at it, I could recognize the difference between a childish accident and deliberate rebellion requiring discipline. In this situation, the only one acting in rebellion was me. So I repented, right there in the space of just about 10 seconds.

The Ravioli Incident still comes up occasionally in our family reminiscences. It's told as a humorous story and one of mom triumphing over the ravioli stains. But I know better. I know that the bigger triumph was over my tongue and my heart, and even over my mind as I submitted to the Lord in that moment.

And I'm still thankful that God taught me a big lesson in those short seconds, an unseen moment turned to His glory.

Review: The Garden, the Curtain, and the Cross

The story of this book is the story of the whole Bible (but a lot shorter!).

The Garden, the Curtain, and the Cross is a beautifully illustrated telling of man's rebellion against and God's gracious plan of redemption. As all good stories should, it starts at the beginning:

A very long time ago, right here in this world, there was a garden.

The author, Carl Lafteron, brings the story of the gospel right down to the level of a three- to six-year-old. Honestly, the simplicity and completeness is something that would be helpful to many adults. Lafteron sums up man's problem in this way:

They decided they wanted a world without God in charge. God calls this "sin". Sin spoils things. So sin has no place in God's wonderful garden....

God said, Because of your sin, you can't come in.

Of course, the story later unfolds the remedy for our sinful situation with much celebration.

God says it is wonderful to live with him. Because of your sin, you can't come in. BUT I died on the cross to take your sin...

Without being Seuss-y, Lafteron writes in an almost sing-songy way. After a few readings, I think parents will find their kids "reading" some of this book for themselves.

Cataline Echeverri's colorful illustrations wonderfully set the mood throughout the book. Echeverri is obviously gifted in using color and style to reinforce the prose. I love that the pictures are designed to evoke a biblical-era feel where appropriate, yet bring in a world-art feel, as well. This adds to the cross-cultural appeal of the book.

I recommend this book not only for parents and grandparents (what a great Easter gift!), but also for churches to make available to their preschool teachers to read aloud. The book itself is printed on high-quality, sturdy paper and is hardbound.

This is the fourth in the Tales that Tell the Truth series, all of which were illustrated by Echeverri and was published by The Good Book Company.


I requested and received a copy of this book in exchange for an impartial review. This post contains affiliate links.

Reasons to celebrate on anniversary of Roe V Wade

On the anniversary of Roe v Wade, I’m celebrating. 

I’m not celebrating the justices who redefined life and liberty on this day many years ago. I’m not celebrating the almost 60 million precious lives taken since the Roe v Wade decision. I’m not celebrating the fact that today, nearly one in five pregnancies end in abortion. 

I’m not celebrating the culture that now surrounds women, one that says, “You are a master of your own destiny... but don’t expect us to help you pick up the pieces should you find yourself pregnant and decide to have that baby,” or, “You can have it all… except a(nother) child.” 

I’m not celebrating the attack on defenseless persons-in-the-womb, deemed undeserving of life because they don’t meet society’s standards, whether due to disability, race, or gender. I’m not celebrating the profiteering non-profit organization that is the largest provider of abortions in our country. I’m not celebrating the departure of so many from the long-held conviction that humans are image-bearers of the Creator.

So what am I celebrating? Bravery and faith.

I’m celebrating the bravery and faith of my own mother, who declining an abortion (and sterilization) recommended for her own health, went on to deliver and raise four children. I’m celebrating the bravery and faith of my friend Lynn who, when faced with an unexpected pregnancy as an unmarried young woman, chose to carry the baby to term and allow her to be adopted but not forgotten; Lynn currently enjoys a wonderful relationship with her daughter, now a young woman herself. I'm celebrating the bravery and faith of friends like Eddie and Patty, who befriended a chemically-dependent pregnant woman and ultimately adopted her newborn son while continuing to reach out to his desperate mother.

I’m celebrating the bravery and faith of my friends like Greg and Marivi, and Nathan and Christine, who are joyfully raising wonderful boys who were created with Down’s Syndrome. I’m thankful for friends like Kathy and Vickie who have given of their time to volunteer at their local crisis pregnancy center. 

I’m celebrating the bravery and faith of many Christians and churches who are beginning to realize that it’s not enough to speak against abortion; we must be willing to walk through the messiness of these situations with the women and men.

After all, like those unborn children, they are also made in the image of the Creator. And that, in itself, is worth celebrating.

Photo credit: bossfight.co; graphics mine.

Review: Do More Better

I always considered myself to be a reasonably organized and productive person. Many years ago, while working in the PR department of a Christian college, I was introduced to a jam-up time management system. I loosely followed and adapted it for the rest of my working-outside-the-home career. But almost twenty years ago, when I became a stay-at-home and sometime part-time work-at-home mom, all of that organization (and the accompanying productivity) seemed to fly out the window.

In hindsight, I don't think the problem was so much a lack of organization or productivity. It was likely more a lack of understanding of my new role and priorities. What's more, my working environment and responsibilities had been fairly controlled and regular. Predictable even. This new career field, not so much.

It wasn't so much that I lacked structure (although I probably did). A new system wasn't the immediate answer.
What I needed was a clearer understanding of my role and responsibilities as a wife and mother. And, because the dual jobs of wife and mother are somewhat fluid, I'm still working on that.

Do More Better by Tim Challies is helping.

Before going into the nuts and bolts of organizing life, Challies walks you through evaluating your life. The goal isn't just to do more, to get more done. It's to get more of the right things done.

Productivity is effectively stewarding your gifts, talents, time, energy, and enthusiasm for the good of others, and the glory of God. Productivity calls you to direct your whole life at this great goal of bringing glory to God by doing good for others.

 I like that. I'm good at being busy, but, "Busyness is a tricksy little fish." It's easy to fool ourselves into thinking we're productive for the Kingdom just because we're busy. The difficult thing is to figure out what God wants us to do for the Kingdom in our little circle and focus on being productive there. "God calls you to be productive for His sake, not your own."

This book is readable, at only 120 pages. It's practical, walking you through not only determining your priorities, but setting up systems to carry them out. It's biblical, helping you see your to-do list from God's perspective (and reminding you that "Only God gets his to-do list done.").

I've read the book through, and now I look forward to the harder work of implementing what I've learned. (One way I'm doing this is by participating in 10 Days of Productivity. Care to join me?)


I requested and received a copy of this book in exchange for an impartial review. This post contains affiliate links.

Dear Wormwood {The Oh Hellos}

Some of my young friends have been talking about a new album from The Oh Hellos. I wasn't familiar with this group, but thought I'd give them a try (especially since I found out how much I'm enjoying Josh Garrel's new album, Home, and I'm thinking he wasn't especially writing for my demographic, either).

I liked many of the songs right away; others are growing on me. The musical style is interesting, and the lyrics are thoughtful and poetic. At the moment, the title track is probably my favorite.

A few years ago, our family read-aloud book was The Screwtape Letters. Jeff made it more fun by giving Screwtape a very austere and ominous voice. (Of course, sometimes he called it The Ducktape Letters and read excerpts in a redneck voice, too. Just part of the package.) It's a great book to read as a family when you have tweens and teens.

Back to The Oh Hellos. When I saw the album was titled Dear Wormwood, I was intrigued. When I heard the song itself, I was drawn in. And when I read the lyrics, I was hooked. I'm a sucker for complex, well-developed music blended well with thoughtful lyrics. It's a powerful song. Listen and enjoy.

When I was a child, I didn't hear a single word you said
The things I was afraid of, they were all confined beneath my bed
But the years have been long, and you have taught me well to hide away
The things that I believed in, you've taught me to call them all escapes

I know who you are now

There before the threshold, I saw a brighter world beyond myself
And in my hour of weakness, you were there to see my courage fail
For the years have been long, and you have taught me well to sit and wait
Planning without acting, steadily becoming what I hate

I know who you are now

I have always known you, you have always been there in my mind
But now I understand you, and I will not be part of your designs

I know who I am now
And all that you've made of me
I know who you are now
And I name you my enemy

I know who I am now
I know who I want to be
I want to be more than this devil inside of me


 This post contains affiliate links.

This and that 12/8/15

Photo: The Jungle Photo; alterations by princapecos

Tim Challies recently posted this 2016 reading challenge, and it looks interesting. I've tried reading challenges before but found it difficult to keep up. I think I'm going to try doing this one as a bit of a scavenger hunt. That'll help balance out my reading, and I think it will be fun to see how many checkmarks I have by the end of the year. That's the plan, anyway! (And I loved that this checklist was a topic of conversation at our ladies' Christmas party last night.)

Speaking of Tim Challies, he's just released a book on productivity that I've added to my ever growing wishlist... then he tweeted that he'd send a review copy to bloggers! It'll be a Kindle e-book version, so the real book will still be on my wishlist (because I'm pretty sure this is one I'll be marking up and coming back to. Be sure to check out Do More Better and watch for my review here.

I saw a great quote on Twitter this week: "Wise women know that it is one thing to make themselves attractive and another to make themselves look seductive." (Which reminds me of another book on my wishlist. I want an copy signed by the authors, who are friends of mine, but the $2.99 Kindle price is tempting right now.)

I'm enjoying some fun Christmas giveaways these days. I've followed the blog of Jones Design Company for several years now (she has a fresh, fun style and is so creative). I'm following her on Instagram now, and she and her creative blogger friends have lots of freebies for the twelve days of Christmas -- pretty printables, wallpapers, and holiday helps.

If you (or friends or family) have small children, here's one other giveaway for you. Sally Lloyd-Jones is giving away a collection of her books for children. These are beautifully illustrated and written -- I wish we'd had these when my kids were younger! (And yes, I did enter the giveaway, not just because I'm a sucker for a lovely book but also to share with little visitors to our home.)

 If you like the graphic on the graphic on this page, I've made into a computer wallpaper that I'd be happy to share. Just let me know and I'll be happy to send it to you! Enjoy the Christmas season -- find the joy!

Dancing with our daughters

A friend recently shared a podcast on Facebook with these questions: “This REALLY spoke to my heart today. Are we raising our daughters to think of marriage as plan A; career/education as plan B? Is this biblical thinking?” She followed up by asking me (and several other women) for our thoughts on it. I thought I’d share my response here, in hopes it might spark some conversation and encourage some of you.

Jen, I’m not sure if/when I’ll have time to listen to that podcast, so I don't know what direction they went with it. But I can share my own thoughts on this topic with you.

First, the term “Plan B” in this scenario has always rubbed me the wrong way, at least since I came into an understanding of God’s sovereignty. While I do believe in being prudent, this makes it sound as though God has given a young woman a desire to be a stay-at-home-wife/mom, yet she may need to venture outside of this plan just in case God doesn’t come through. That may not be what is intended, but it kind of comes across that way.

So here’s what I think. If a young lady has a God-given desire to be a stay-at-home-wife/mom, encourage that. As you encourage that, knowing that fulfillment of that desire may be deferred indefinitely, also encourage her to pursue development of her God-given gifts and abilities. If she has a creative bent, help her to explore many different expressions of that bent. If she is good with children, either formally teaching or informally caring/nurturing them, help her to explore that. This young lady may be interested in science, math, mountaineering, literature – help her to explore. This exploration may or may not include college or formal training. All the while, continue to also train her in the home arts, as they’ll likely be needed whatever path she follows. I think (and I’ve probably been guilty of this) some parents are afraid that if their daughter pursues a college degree or the like, she will desire to become a career woman and abandon any thought of being a SAHM for their grandchildren. For homeschoolers, especially, this can have very scary implications!

Here’s what these parents are forgetting. This beautiful young woman is a masterpiece of our Creator. He made her, He numbers her days, He holds her. Only He can direct her heart. We are stewards of the gift of our children, but as they get older, our stewarding influence must lessen and they must begin to steward their own lives. This is hard. I hate to break it to the parents of toddlers out there, but raising young adults is the hardest work you’ll ever do. It’s probably not as hard physically, but it is much harder emotionally and spiritually. It’s heart work, and it’s a dance. I don’t know that I’ll ever figure out all the steps to this dance (the rhythm changes so often!). But I’m thankful to know Who has all of these steps planned out.

I am case in point.

When I was in high school, I set some lofty goals for myself. I had a strong aversion to any kind of secretarial work. I wanted to be Vice President of a corporation (with a male secretary, no less). I worked to earn a full-ride scholarship to a university in my state. I was on my way.

But then God intervened in the form of a great humbling and a God-chasing young man.

As I worked my way through my freshman year, it was such a struggle. College coursework didn’t come as easily to me as high school, but it was also harder to put my heart into it. Much of it seemed irrelevant to me, and some was downright offensive (such as the pornographic film played for my health class). But I buckled down and persevered. In December, that young man shared with our church that he was feeling a calling to full-time ministry and, in February, we were engaged. I struggled through that second semester, explored changing my major from marketing to… what? In the end, I pursued a backward transfer to a local community college with the end goal of completing an Associate’s degree (which I did do, after we were married). It was very humbling, and it took God changing my heart for me to relinquish my plan to follow His.

Guess what job I held during our engagement? Yup. I became a secretary. At my church (best job I ever had). Guess what job I held while Jeff was pursuing seminary degrees? Yup. Secretary again.

It wasn’t really until we began thinking about having a second child that I felt a real yearning to be a stay-at-home-wife/mom. God has provided a way for me to follow this new career (in some really amazing ways, actually). And those secretarial skills have served me well in not only assisting my husband in his work, but have also helped me earn income through several work-from-home jobs over the years.

You know, for many of my growing up years, my mother was a SAHM. In fact, she was the penultimate SAHM, a real Proverbs 31 woman – cooked from scratch, made clothes for us, made our home feel like home. She did occasionally work outside the home as well; even then, we knew that her focus remained on us, her family. When my heart was turned homeward, I had a great example to follow. The Lord had provided that, as well.

Talk with your daughter, model for your daughter, release her to explore, and trust God with her steps. Dance with her and enjoy this season of life.